37 posts tagged abuse
The best thing about it was that it took the post and tried to disprove all of my points. My favorite one was when they said “consent to sex is not consent to pregnancy”.
[bitch you serious gif]
It’s not a hard concept. Consenting to one thing is in…
There is a very large difference, that being that consent to one under the circumstance of no protection is enabling the process of another. Once the first step has been taken, there’s no control over the second, being pregnancy. Therefore, consent to pregnancy is not a thing.
It’s really, really simple. Besides, other than the fact that condoms can break on their own, what asshole would sabotage counter-pregnancy like that? I’d check who I was dating first, that’s essentially not far off from rape.
Congrats, you just managed to blame abuse victims for being in abusive relationships! You win an award for being a piece of shit. :)
And there is the twist of words. An abusive boyfriend is one thing, one who pokes holes in condoms, that’s just something I’ve never even heard of happening before.
And THAT is exactly the kind of judgment I was talking about in the first post. I am automatically a douchebad because I think that idea is ridiculous?
Have a link! The relevant part reads “Approximately one in five young women said they experienced pregnancy coercion and 15 percent said they experienced birth control sabotage. Fifty-three percent of respondents said they had experienced physical or sexual violence from an intimate partner. Thirty-five percent of the women who reported partner violence also reported either pregnancy coercion or birth control sabotage.”
It’s very, very common in abusive situations.
Now, onto your second point- that consent to sex is consent to pregnancy. I’m going to introduce you to two legal concepts called ongoing consent and explicit consent. When someone is consenting to sex, they are not explicitly consenting to pregnancy- in fact, more than half of women* who get abortions are using some form of contraception at the time.
Now, let’s pretend for a moment that you are right, and consent to sex IS consent to pregnancy. That is still ignoring the concept of ongoing consent. When an action is not a single action, but an ongoing situation, it requires ongoing consent. I know the application of this concept to pregnancy is one not often considered, but it is fully applicable.
So let’s break this down into the simplest form I can produce- a basic syllogism.
- Does an ongoing action, condition or situation require ongoing consent? The law and common sense say yes.
- Is pregnancy an ongoing condition, action or situation? Yes.
- Therefore, pregnancy requires ongoing consent.
So even if the action of sexual intercourse itself is consent to pregnancy (which I personally disagree with) the action of continuing to stay pregnant requires ongoing consent. If that consent is withdrawn, so too must the action of continuing to stay pregnant end.
A parallel I have used in the past is the one most commonly associated with the concept of ongoing consent: sex. If my SO and I are getting sexy, and I decide, for whatever reason, be it convenience, mental state, health-related, my period, or just not feeling it any more, that I don’t want to continue having sex, and I communicate this to him, he is obliged to stop. If he does not, that is rape.
According to the logic that you seem to be using, because I consented before the sexual experience began, I have no right withdrawing that consent in the middle of the sexual experience. Any logical, feeling person will see how that is not okay. Pregnancy is ongoing. And for pregnancy to continue, my consent must also continue.
Thank you for saying this so well. I wanted to talk about this in more detail but I have a final due in…2.5 hours and I need to stop procrastinating so hard.